What Was I Doing Again?

You know what really grinds my gears? When I call the waiter back to the table to take our order when she’s just taken it ten minutes earlier. Or when I tell my husband the same story three times because I have no recollection whether I’ve shared it already or not. And when I start walking down the hall to do…something…and abort because I can’t remember what the hell it was.

While I’m not quite a humanoid Dory the fish yet, short-term memory loss is a PITA. Now that I’ve vented about that, here’s some good news. My brain MRI taken in November (you know – the results I forgot to post about) showed a significant reduction of radiation necrosis (dead tissue and other inflammation around the brain metastases). So Avastin is working to keep my brain chugging along (at whatever pace it sees fit, apparently). I’ll have another brain MRI late winter/early Spring and my neuro-oncologist predicts another three Avastin treatments total.

In other good news, I had a CT scan last week of my chest and abdomen to see how the rest of my body is doing, and it came back “stable” (i.e., no new tumors). Taking 20+ pills a day is keeping my headaches, nausea, and other symptoms under control, so at this point I’m staying as mobile as I can and trying to enjoy the holiday season.

My bucket list needs some adjustments. I know I won’t be writing that novel. I’ve lost too many words and others slip just far enough away to help me function but not flourish. And I won’t be planning a Niagara Falls getaway with my family or a romantic trip to Hawaii with my husband anytime soon. In fact, planning is a month-to-month and sometimes a week-to-week exercise, not a yearly one. But I’m here – not just for the holidays, but for (fingers crossed) Spring graduations too.

Tim and I hope all of you are having a healthy and happy holiday season!

9 thoughts on “What Was I Doing Again?

  1. And a happy holiday to you and yours my friend.
    I awake each day and tell myself that today is a great day to be alive. It is a great day to spread joy. It is a great day to love. It is a great day.
    Here’s to a many more great days.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. I love that you write this. I think of all of you often. Hang in there . Max and I send you virtual hugs and may you dream of pushing crosswalk buttons like he does.

    Liked by 1 person

  3. You have sooo much courage and faith! I am just so very proud of the way that you take each step at a time. Never give up!!!! Keep on writing, praying, walking, living, etc…….enjoy your life to its fullest. So many prayers and thoughts are with you! Love, Nancy W.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. You are an inspiration to anyone facing challenges today. You’ve already written your book in you diary of updates on your ‘livingwithstageiv’. Happy Holidays!
    Love, Flo

    Liked by 1 person

  5. You are a gift…..to all of us. You have always been so. The second greatest gift to us is Tim, because Tim is a godsend and takes such GREAT care of someone who means so much to all of us……you. My prayers will continue for all of you. Together you have taught us that little things are just that and that love is the greatest equalizer in anything we face. I thank God for both of you because if anyone needs to find the spirit of Christmas, anytime during the year, they need to look no further than the bond between you two. May your holiday bring family all around you and peace on your continue journey. Much Love always.

    Liked by 1 person

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